Questionable

How do we live questionable lives? This is the question that has been following me around since I moved to the city. Since the beginning of my internship, I’ve been a part of a Forge cohort where we literally wrestle with this question every week. (Forge is an organization that is committed to mobilizing everyday people to be missionaries where they live, work, and play.) Something you’ve probably heard me say is how difficult it is be a Christian in this culture. I grew up in the Bible-belt Midwest, where people at least had context for church and Christianity. Then I went to a Christian college, where I lived in a safe bubble for four years, learning intellectually about Jesus, the church, faith, etc. And NYC is neither of those places. For the first time in my life, I am surrounded by people who don’t look like me, talk like me, or believe like me. It’s humbling. Hard, different, but humbling. And I’m learning more than I thought possible as I listen to the voices of those around me.

At a conference I attended this week, I was challenged by what one of the speakers said. He talked about how one of his friends challenged him one week. His friend said something along these lines: “When I ask how you are, you say tired. When I ask how things are going, you say you’re stressed. When I ask how your week has been, you say busy. You say you follow Jesus, but your responses are no different from anyone else.” That hit me. That hit me hard. Living questionable lives that point people back to Jesus means that my answers should be filled with the goodness of Jesus’ message, not the busyness and distractions of the world. Time and time again, Jesus takes time to retreat and spend time with the Father. He rests and calls us to that rest. But if my response to the chaos of life is the same exact response as someone who doesn’t have the hope of Jesus living in them, how is that good news? I’ve spent the past several years living a busy life. And it’s easy to live a busy and tiring life in the city. But part of living questionably in ways that orient people towards Jesus will require a different way of living. When I live rushed, exhausted, and busy, I miss out on opportunities to bless someone around me. I find myself not having the energy to extend an invite to gather around the table. I don’t have time to sit with the Lord and listen to His voice. I’m learning how to reclaim my schedule. I don’t have control over my hours at Juniors, but I can do my part to be well-rested and re-filled before I go.

Living a questionable life that following Jesus produces has opened my eyes to the lack of knowledge that some people have about Christianity. I’ve been asked if certain things are “Christian things.” Someone asked me if it was a Christian thing to save dating for marriage. I laughed, and we were able to have a good conversation about how my faith impacts my views on dating and marriage. It’s also led to lots of criticism as people don’t think my values on some things are actually helpful (like modesty). But in the midst of living life with people who are different from me, I am amazed at the ways the Holy Spirit is already working and moving in this city. Other followers of Jesus are being mobilized to live lives that point others to Jesus. When I walk through Times Square, I can’t help but imagine what it might be like if revival happened here. If the truth of Jesus was being lived out amidst the masses, how different would the messages be? And that encourages me to live in a way that lets others see glimpses of the kingdom of heaven here on earth.

Prayer Requests:

• for ResLifeNYC: for wisdom and discernment in the coming months and that God would continue to bless our ministry
• for the finances to continue living in the city
• for strength in the midst of hard and long hours at Juniors
• for continued movement in this city, that Jesus would be known in every neighborhood.